5 reasons to watch Memoirs of a Geisha

1. Looks pretty spectacular in parts
2. Ummm...
3. Let me see...
4. Nope
5. That's about it.
   

Ok, so I guess there is one reason to watch Memoirs of a Geisha - maybe 2 if you read the book and want to compare. There's nothing realllllly wrong with it, the story moves along at a reasonable pace and the performances are all pretty fair but director Rob (Chicago) Marshall and the big man himself Spielberg have stamped big Hollywood schlockfest all over this.

It's the tale of a country girl who gets sold to the madam of a "we are sooo not hookers" Geisha house and the trials and tribulations she undergoes on her way to become a famous classy hooker (sorry, Geisha). (Yes I get that the art of Geisha is about more than sex but to watch this film you'd think the girls get a root once in their lives, if you'll excuse the earthy)

I'm not sure how you could make a film about sex workers so snoreworthy - though I note the book was written by a guy - that might be a clue.

Just the one reason to watch this then.